Why You Keep Ending Up in the Same Relationship — and How to Finally Break the Pattern

A podcast with Valerie Greene of the Soul Shaking Love Podcast

We don’t fall into our relationship patterns by accident. Most of us are living out beliefs we absorbed early on—about love, safety, power, desire, and which parts of ourselves are acceptable. This isn’t about blaming childhood or rewriting history. It’s about recognizing the patterns we’re repeating so we can consciously choose something healthier and more fulfilling.

Reprogramming those early scripts is at the core of my work, which is why this conversation felt so natural. We explored how childhood conditioning shows up in adult relationships—how it shapes attraction, communication, intimacy, and the ways we negotiate power with a partner.

In this conversation, we unpack how those old stories quietly drive behavior, how people end up performing or masking instead of showing up authentically, and what it actually takes to rewrite patterns rather than intellectualize them. We talked about desire—why so many people are afraid of their own wants, how shame gets wired early, and how reclaiming desire is often a gateway to deeper connection.

We also addressed my work as a Dom—not as something sensational, but as a framework for understanding consent, power, boundaries, and choice. We talked honestly about what people often misunderstand about that work and why it can be a powerful tool for healing relational patterns instead of reinforcing them.

Audio Only:

Links:

Podcast: Soul Shaking Love Podcast